Humpty Dumpty and I sat on a wall... I had a great fall......
It was a hot sunny January morning. Humpty, Dumpty and I were sitting on a 10 ft. high wall. Humpty was humming a romantic tune form a tragic comedy as he was happy in his love life.Dumpty was singing a tragic rap song from a thriller cuz he was dumped by the love of his life...And the day was moving on...
Till date, I don’t really know how, but out of an impulse, I just fell down the wall...the 10 ft. high wall!! I thought it was the end of my life… “God! Thanks for blessing me with this beautiful life! Now that you need me there, I’m all ready to come up to your service..!” I thought. “Good people go early, they say!” and so my time had come. Two minutes and I had not opened my eyes. Slowly I lifted my delicate eyelashes… ” Is this heaven oh! Dear lord...am I one of your precious helpers now?”
I guess the wall was too high; I needed time to come out of that shock. Yes, I was normal again, and I wasn’t dead! But wait I could smell something, not sweet for sure, it was a stinky smell... (Now I was positive I wasn’t dead cuz if THIS is heaven then it sure Stinks!!)
Oh my God!! I had landed in a garbage truck. It took me time to get back to my senses, but till then the truck had moved on. I couldn’t bear that smell. I stopped breathing.30 seconds…..1 minute…two minutes. That’s was it! I couldn’t stand it anymore. I jumped as high as I could, OUT of the truck, and what a high jump it was!! Sure I was out of that crap load.Ah! Fresh air! I was breathing again! “Life is beautiful…..hmmm…..and I AM MOVING???” I was moving forward.Oh wow! I was then standing on the top of a human pyramid. Fifteen people, one bike and ME!! Then something struck my mind... ooo my smart mind...the day was 26th of January! HAPPY REPUBLIC DAY! And these people were practicing for the parade. It felt good...better...best! All was going oh so fine, till the man riding the bike smelled something, something bad (yeah that was me, stinky me!)And then, we all witnessed the Biggest sneeze Ever! So big that it could carry an unbeatable record in my Guinness book of sneeze records, ‘if’ I had any.Anyways, that was one hell of a “spray storm”, and our very own human pyramid of Gaza came all the way down... Once again, I could see St. Peter in front of my eyes… But This time I landed in a manhole...What a great day? From one stinky place to another. Well that’s destiny, as they say it!
Hmm... Them I saw something shiny...and I remembered the good ‘ol sayin –“All that glitters is Gold” Now that’s what god wanted to give my after this hectic or rather say stinky day. Thank you god for loving me so much... I moved towards that shiny thing and I heard some weird noises-“must be the atoms and molecules chattering (Gimme a break! I was stupid!) I moved on...Gold ah! Gold!.....OH MY GOD!!! The manhole monster!! He was huge and ugly and scary and stinky!!! A big loud screech...AAAAAAAAAA!! And that was it, the next thing I know, I’m in his stomach, eeuuu!! All that green blood and everything!
Well by this time you must have known me quite well, I Had to take my revenge!! “You monster! You ate me, now you’ll repent”, I thought. I mingled all his blood capillaries and tied knots in them. Then I intermixed all his intestines-Large intestine, small intestine, and MEDIUM intestine...all of them!! And my final move, his kidneys…I just banged them together!! Another surprise waiting people, the whole place (his big stomach) was full of smoke as I crashed his kidneys together! Then, there she was, the most beautiful, the most amazing, The Kidney Genie!! Yes, she was a kidney Genie (now I know you do not believe me, cuz you are just jealous!) I was facing a blend of emotions, I was happy, scared, amazed, Infactuated and more….
She was beautiful. “I am the kidney genie,” she said, “Your wish is my command master!” (Yeah, that was me...master…) “Your first wish? “Marry me”, I thought, “Get me out of this monster,” I said and poof! I was out in the world again.
“Your second wish?” “Marry me”, I thought, “Get me all clean and fresh,” I said. And poof! I was as clean as the cleanliest man on earth was!
“Your third wish, your last wish?” “Marry me”, I thought, “marry me,” I said………………
And POOF!! I was on the wall, crawling like a lizard, or wait, I Was a lizard! A lizard, yes, but….
I Can explain-
Actually, that pretty kidney genie was from the planet Krypton (well earth does not produce such stuff!!)Anyways,she spoke kryptish language in which “marry me” stands for—“Respected Lady, I will be highly obliged if you convert me into something, an organism that is really creepy, crawls on dirty walls regenerates its tail when cut into pieces and is hated by people around.” That was it! No one is to blame now...Not her, not me, no one...
Well I did not get married to that angel but I Did become a lizard.
All I could say was-“A stinky end to a stinky journey that had a stinky beginning…”
PS:My pal Stinky Boy AIN'T my inspiration for this lethal creation..please don't hang him,he's nice..It was a total "When ur out'a your mind" production
PPS:i DID NOT write it!! Sacchi! uhh......All right, It was me..[:(] Eat me!!
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